Invisible Light

No story this week. I toyed with doing a fan fiction piece but saner heads prevailed.

Instead I would like to present 'Invisible Light' by the Scissor Sisters since I wish I had created it. Watch it pretend that it was taken directly from my brain.

My Top 5 Games of the Year

In my years of being on the internet, I have found that people are too busy during the last week of the year to be reading porn. I like to think that they are rushing about and fucking as many people as possible before the new year turns them back into office drones and school teachers. Whatever the reason, they usually aren't reading my stories this week.

Free from the constraints of making smut, I thought I would share with you my top five games of the year. I'm a writer so I don't have time to plat Everquest, Warcraft or anything else that is a second job. I do however need something fun, interesting and entertaining to play in between writing about blowjobs. I am also a cheap ass so I don't like to spend 50$ on a 12 hour shooting game.

Game #5 Desktop Dungeons- This free game is very simple yet also terribly difficult. You create a character and enter a dungeon as big as your monitor screen. You walk around killing things, grabbing loot and leveling your character as you seek to defeat the big boss of the level. That's it. Most games last ten minutes.

What keeps me playing this game every day is that as you defeat dungeons, you unlock new character classes and new equipment. The levels are random so in a lot of cases, you just can't win. That's okay as you can just quit and start a new game. You keep throwing players into this meat grinder of a game and when you finally do defeat a boss, it is like winning the lottery. You dance. You cheer. You look at the new character class that you have unlocked and you try again.

If you have ever played Dungeons and Dragons and wished you could play again, just without all the paperwork, other players and rattle of dice, then this is the game for you. So much fun for literally nothing.

Game #4 Eschalon Book 2- Back in the early days of computer gaming, we had lovely games like Ultima and Fallout where 2D worlds were wonderfully deep and filled with gameplay. Because it was 2D and turn based instead of processor hogging #D and real time, the designers could really invest some complexity and depth to their games. Now all of the complexity is put into realistic blood splatters.

The polar opposite of Desktop Dungeons, Eschalon Book 2 is a nice long journey into a fantasy world. You have stats. You have character classes and choices. You have boxes to open and monsters to kill. You have a story and a world to explore. Best of all, it is all turn based so slow pokes like me can make choices at my leisure. It is the kind of game we would have been playing in the early 90's except it has been made with today's technology.

My wife especially loves this game. She racked up 90 hours on it before she solved it. It is one of the few games that she has solved as she frequently gets too bored with games to finish them. This game has depth and it kept her interested all the way to the end. That deserves a medal in itself.

At 24.95, it is half the price of most mainstream games with ten times the gameplay time.

Game #3 Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!A Reckless Disregard for Gravity - This is a game where you jump off of floating buildings, weave in between psychedelic structures, flip off protesters, wave at your fans and spray paint graffiti on government buildings as you fall. You score points for stunts and but mostly you splatter against structures and wince repeatedly. It is a brutally fun good time.

I know what you're thinking- "Shon, you're an old fuddy duddy who plays turn based games! How can you have fun playing something that relies on reflexes to not turn your bones to paste?"

The anwser is that every part of the game is so much fun, I just keep coming back to it. The game opens with a statement; "Dejoban Games, proudly making computer games for 75 years." It starts with a ludicrous joke. The menu screen plays muzak. The unlock section has a video with a cookie recipe. Giant billboards of employees appear while you are plummeting down great heights. The game designers looked at every part of the game and made it a joke. This attention to humor is a huge inspiration to me as a writer but it also makes for a fun party atmosphere. I mostly die in this game but it is still a good time.

It is also a good tight game. Falling feels right. It is exhilarating. Even screwing up is spectacular as you collide with flat surfaces at breakneck speeds.

Aaaaa etc is currently selling for 9.99 on their website.

Game #2 Delve Deeper - The King of the Dwarfs demands treasure. Because he also believes in competition, he sends multiple teams of dwarfs to kill monsters and each other as they struggle to be the team that brings back the most gold to the king.

This is the rare game that feels like a board game in the best possible way. You pick tiles to explore the caves and you move your team of five dwarfs like a war game. Unlike a board game, the computer takes care of all the annoying math as well as providing a really smart AI to play against. You come across treasure chests filled with random crazy shit like the world's worse deck of treasure cards.

There are a few mechanics that really make this game shine. Dwarfs never die. They get beat down and go to sleep, but they are never eliminated. One on one, most of the monsters are pretty weak. When 20 monsters come at you though, you are in deep shit but you might still wear them down. This is a game where you will get treasure, the question is whether you will get more treasure than your opponents. It creates an atmosphere that you are really tough and powerful but are you smart enough?

Much like Aaaaa etc, this game drips with humor. You will take on dwarf teams named after the A-team or the boxers from the Rocky movies. Treasure is always interesting from the worthless painting of treasure to the epic like the Blue Belt of Holding In Your Stomach. The monsters are cute and the Dwarf King is constantly heckling you for more treasure. With over 100 uniquely named treasure items, you will always come across a fresh joke.

At five dollars, this game is a steal.

Game #1 Minecraft - Imagine that you are a castaway on a world rich with resources. You have trees that can give you wood. You have rock and iron quarries that you can make tools with. You have have pigs that you can hunt for food. You have sand to make glass, clay to make bricks and coal to make torches. You have no people to talk to but hey, you're like Tom Hanks and Macgyver combined.

Which is good, because when night falls, zombies, skeletons, spiders and worse will come out of nowhere and fuck your shit up. You better have a house, a bunker or something that you can hide in because the night monsters will kill you. Day light will finally come and burn most of the monsters away but the rest you will have to kill with sword and arrow. The upside is that you will use their remains to make new things.

That is Minecraft in a nutshell. You build, you scavenge and you survive. There is no story except your story. There is no goals except the ones you make for yourself. Want to make a tower of glass and stone? Well you better dig up sand and mine some stone then. Want to make a watch so you know what time it is? You need to find some gold and the mysterious red stone then. It is a game where you have nothing that you need to do, but there is plenty to do once you decide what you want. It is a remarkably freeing game to play.

It is currently in beta but there is no game that I have played more this year. I have built roads and towers and a network of safe houses across the country side. Why? Because it was fun. Unlike Sims where you build houses with a few mouse clicks, here you build houses by mining the raw materials and then placing it brick by brick. I have spent hours building roads connecting my towers not because I received some sort of gold or experience award but because I was tired of getting lost in the hills near my castle.

The graphics are a curious retro blend of cubic blocks. It looks blocks and simple and yet I have seen sunsets and deserts that took my breathe away. There is an artistry here that just has to be seen to be beleived.

The game alternates between relaxing and tense. It is relaxing when I am building a beach house with a pier. It is tense as fuck when I am underground stalking a skeleton that I can clattering nearby. When you dig into the earth, you often find natural caverns filled with monsters and rare resources. Torchlight will keep new monsters from spawning but you gotta place that torch there first. When the pressure of cavern crawling gets to be too much, I retreat above ground and make a greenhouse so my farm can grow crops without sheep trampling it. It is a game that provides entertainment no matter what my mood is.

That concludes my list. Funny how four of these games involve fantasy dungeons and treasure. Also, every game was made by a small indy studio. These games are lean mean fun times designed to entertain, not secure a multi million dollar X-box deal. I hope you have as much fun with them as I have.

Fiction: Midterms

My midterms had been going great. My Erotic Writing 101 test was a breeze as well as my Nude Photography 201 class. My jaw was a little sore from my Oral Pleasure class but the redhead I had to eat was a delight. I know I aced my Vibrator Repair test as well as my Critical 70’s Porn Movie Studies test.

The only test I was worried about was my Basic Spanking Class. Christ, I enjoyed spanking the lovely asses of the women that were supplied by the class, but the teacher was another matter. Mrs. Marshall was a real ball buster. At first I was excited to have her as a teacher because she is pretty hot for an older woman. She has this curly brown hair that she wears down to her shoulders and every day she wore a new blouse that revealed even more cleavage than the day before. She was great to look at but as soon as she opened her mouth, she would cut you down and make you feel like the world’s biggest idiot with a paddle.

One time I was spanking my model and Mrs. Marshall came up behind me. She sighed with genuine sadness.

“Peter, I know you never masturbate because that is the weakest swing I have ever seen,” she said. “You have the grip of an eight year old girl.”

What the fuck does that even mean? It didn’t stop the rest of the class from laughing. Hell, even my model was giggling. It does nothing for your confidence when the person you are spanking is laughing at you.

As you can imagine, I wasn’t looking forward to my test. Mrs. Marshall insisted on testing each student individually so I didn’t even have the rest of my class to hide in. I arrived at Mrs. Marshall’s office with my paddle and a shit load of nerves.

Mrs. Marshall was sitting at her desk and today she hadn’t even bothered to put on a blouse. She was wearing a black lace bra that held in those lovely breasts that I had been peeking at all semester. She had her hair down and framing her cruel face. She looked up at me and frowned. My very presence appeared to disappoint her.

“Peter, I will be with you in a moment,” she said. She returned to her paperwork.

I glanced around. We were alone in the office. “Uh, where’s my spanking model?”

Mrs. Marshall ignored me. I wasn’t terribly surprised. I did worry that maybe I was suppose to supply my own model for the test. Mrs. Marshall would spend a good ten minutes pointing out my mental deficiencies if I forgot to bring something. I waited nervously until she was done with her papers.

“All right, Peter, let’s get this over with,” she said.

Mrs. Marshall stood up and I realized she wasn’t wearing any pants. Shit, she wasn’t wearing panties either. I had a good look at the hairy bush of pubic hair between her thighs. She bent over her desk and supported herself on her elbows in a classic #2 Spanking Position.

Holy shit.

“Well, what are you for?” Mrs. Marshall said. “Show me what tiny bit of knowledge managed to sink into your skull this semester.”

I gripped my paddle and walked around to her side of the desk. Her ass was just as round and full as her tits. I had to pause to subtly rearrange my erection under my pants. She was wearing black lace stockings that matched her bra. She also had on high heels that really lifted her ass. It was a stunning sight to behold.

“Any time now, Peter,” Mrs. Marshall said. “I am sure you remember something of your lessons.”

I was paralyzed with terror. I remembered plenty. I recalled every insult she made about my form. Seared into my memory was every snide comment about how I treated my spanking models. I have dreams where Mrs. Marshall is critiquing every single thing I did. Remembering was not the problem; the problem was I might never forget this bitch and her class.

Then I realized that I had nothing left to lose. What else was she going to do to me? Fail me and criticize me some more?

I placed the paddle against her ass. Slowly I ran the paddle over the curves of her bottom. This was supposed to sensitize the ass for the spanking about to come but it served a different purpose for me. I was building up courage and ramping up my anger.

I grabbed her bra strap as a handle and swung my paddle back. Her back dipped as she prepared for the blow. I deliberately waited a few seconds more than necessary. Let her sweat for once.

The paddle swung through the air and connected with Mrs. Marshall’s ass. It was a good solid hit. Technically I think it was too hard for an opening spank and I am sure Mrs. Marshall was going to count it against me but I didn’t care. The gasp she made when the paddle hit her was worth it.

After the first hit, my body went into automatic. I swung the paddle again and this time hit her right buttock. A second hit landed on her left buttock. I alternated back and forth until at a random moment I struck her square in the center of her ass. All of those classes and instructions were actually paying off.

I pulled tighter on her bra as I picked up the pace. I peppered her ass with spanks in a clockwise manner. Her round bottom turned a lovely shade of pink. After applying the clockwise technique, I switched back to a left-right pattern that traveled her ass from top to bottom. From there I tried a more advanced two hit followed by the three hit rhythm. My fear had melted away as I put every lesson to work.

Spanking Mrs. Marshall’s lovely bare ass was nice, but the real treat was the lack of criticisms. That didn’t mean she was silent. She groaned when I struck her hard and she moaned when my paddle hit her in one certain sweet spot. For all I knew she could be mentally failing me but at least she wasn’t saying it out loud. When she whimpered from a fast barrage of spanks, I could almost believe she just a woman and not the bane of my semester.

It was also turning me the fuck on. I released her bra strap and it snapped painfully down on her back. She spun her head around and glared at me but fuck, I was too horny to care. I kept spanking her except now I reached underneath her and grabbed a handful of her bra covered tit.

I expected her to cuss me out. Mrs. Marshall moaned instead. I moaned too. Sinking my fingers into those tits that have teased me all semester was awesome. My erection throbbed and I spanked harder as a poor sex substitute.

My paddle tore into Mrs. Marshall’s ass. Despite my arousal, I was still spanking her according to the techniques. I had a death grip on her tit but my paddling arm was tapping out different rhythms on her now red ass. My anger had faded and now I was spanking with pure libido.

“Fuck!” Mrs. Marshall said. “Stop, stop stop!”

I stopped in mid swing. Oh shit, I was worried. I figured I had flunked for sure. I still had her tit in my hand though.

“Fuck me,” Mrs. Marshall said.

I stood there dumbly.

“Fuck me Peter!” Mrs. Marshall said. “Fuck me now while my ass is still hot. Do it!”

There was no arguing. I let go of her tit and ripped my pants open. I yanked my boxers down and took my cock in hand. Mrs. Marshall spread her legs and reached for me. She took a firm hold of my cock and guided me in.

Wet warm delicious liquid forbidden perfect heaven engulfed my cock. I sank into her pussy till her burning hot ass pressed against me. The heat radiating from her spanked ass was incredible. Pride surged through me. That ass is burning because of me.

We fucked. My cock rammed into her with the same fury that I had spanked her ass. Mrs. Marshall growled as we fucked, urging me to go faster and faster. I kept spanking her ass with my hand. After giving one of the best spankings of my life, I wasn’t willing to stop.

We came pretty fast. It is debatable who climaxed first. It was like we had been fucking for a good long time before my cock was in her. We were both ready to burst and it didn’t take long at all.

After we finished, I reluctantly pulled out and pulled my pants back on. Mrs. Marshall simply sat back down on her chair. I smirked when she winced at her bottom touching the seat.

“Not bad, Peter,” Mrs. Marshall said.

I didn’t say anything. It wasn’t much of a compliment but at least it wasn’t an insult. That’s progress, right?

“I’m going to give you an ‘A’,” Mrs. Marshall said. “And I want you to seriously consider taking my advanced spanking class next semester.”

“Uhh, I’ll consider that,” I said.

“See that you do,” Mrs. Marshall said.

Five Stars of Awesome

Have a minute? I need to ask a favor of anyone who has purchased one of my books. It doesn't matter if you bought a PDF or a physical book. I need to ask your indulgence in some sort of arcane science called 'marketing.'

Specifically, I would like you to go to Lulu and either rate a book or write a review. There is a lot of erotica for sale on Lulu but 99% of it doesn't have ratings or reviews. Quite frankly, it looks like a bunch of vanity projects for sale and without any sort of customer rating, you never know if you are purchasing someone's dirty IM chats that they made into a book.

Right now only the Island Princess book has a rating. Whomever did that gets a cookie. When you write your review or give your rating, feel free to be as honest as you like. Mostly I want to let new consumers know that these books are actually read and enjoyed by people other than my wife.

I have no idea if this kind of customer participation will result in even a single new purchase but hey, it's not about the money. It's about my vanity. Please help me feel like a real grown up author.

Click on the links below to go the main page of each book.

Thanks.

Prisoner of the Wizard's Harem

Cell Phone Slave

The Colette-Ashbee Collection

Island Princess Bedtime Stories and Activity Book

Fiction: Those About to Fall

Defina stepped onto the platform. The wind whipped through her long red hair. The wind also bit into her nude flesh and sent chills down her spine. The hoverwing straps provided no protection from the cold as the only purpose of the straps were to separate and accent her breasts. She slid down her goggles over her eyes so that she could see. It was a glorious day.

The dozen other jumpers stood beside Defina. They were a fine gathering of Euphorian flesh. Each one of them was a champion of Fuck-Falling as well as a celebrity among the planet bound masses. Defina was honored to stand among them this year.

A hologram of Queen Erishella appeared. The regal Queen appeared as a giant before them. She was dressed in white furs that blended in with the clouds. Her lips were painted the color of blood, a color some of the Fuck-Fallers would see today.

“Those about to fall, I salute you!” Queen Erishella said.

That was the signal. Defina stepped off the platform.. Some of the fallers jumped. Two of them turned around and fell backwards. No matter their style of entry, they all began their plummet to the planet below.

Defina kept her arms together and pointed her body. Her lithe body cut through the air like a dart. She knew from experience that a little distance between you and the others were advisable. Interfering with other Fuck-Fallers was forbidden, but when a person is splattered across several fields, there isn’t exactly a way to compensate a fouled player.

She also knew that separating yourself from the crowd was a good way to get the vidcameras focused on you. It was one thing to win; it was another to win with style.

The beauty of the planet of Euphoria stretched out before her. Falling like this, you really appreciate what a wonderful planet this was. Vast cities, giant mountains and lush oceans made up this world. It would almost be an honor to crash against it.

A twisting body caught her eye. It was hard to tell from here, but judging from the platinum hair, Defina guessed that it was Levase. The woman was a rookie and a rising star to have made it to today’s match. It would explain why she was obviously panicking. Her spinning body was out of control and Defina seriously doubted anyone could masturbate at that speed of rotation.

Well, they could masturbate, but they certainly wouldn’t climax. If they didn’t climax, then the hoverwings wouldn’t activate. If the hoverwings didn’t stop you from smashing into the ground, then how could you be alive to score points depending on your performance?

Speaking of which, Defina decided that it was time. She spread her legs as wide as she could, knowing that somewhere a flying vidcamera was zooming in. Her right hand went to her cunt and began stroking. Her left hand went to her chest and began mauling her wind pressed breasts.

Defina knew what the crowds below wanted. They wanted to see her stick four fingers inside her. They wanted her back to arch in the throes of sensual spasms. They wanted her red hair trailing behind her body like a flaming comet’s tail. They wanted to see her play with massive tits they would never get to touch.

The curve of the planet was flattening out at a disturbing pace. She could pick out details on the ground below. She was entering the danger zone, that sweet spot of fatality where if a fuck-Faller didn’t orgasm soon, then there was going to be pulverized souvenirs for the fans on the ground. It was also the area where you can get the most points.

Defina let go of her breast and grabbed her ass instead. Under the watchful eye of the vidcameras, Defina violated her ass with a desperate urgency. She began to spin, head over heels as she finger fucked her cunt and her ass.

The viewers at home would be breathless. They would wonder if she had lost control. They would wonder if she was about to die. Those who were masturbating would quicken their pace to climax before she died before them. Of course, some of them would hold off their orgasm, hoping to come when they saw her graphic death happen.

The thought of denying those fans their orgasm aided in bringing about Defina’s. She smiled at the thought of those bloodthirsty bastards, their cocks in their hands, waiting for her gruesome death and needing her blood to come. The thought of a million assholes groaning in disappointment sent a surge of delight through her cunt.

Defina came. She moaned in pleasure as the vidcameras recorded her facial expressions. The hoverwings activated. Defina spun once and then assumed a landing position with her legs. She pulled out the finger in her ass but she kept the one in her cunt stroking. The crowd loves an insatiable star.

She landed safely. The absence of falling felt strange. The afterglow was overtaken by the roar of the crowd. The judges were announcing the points she had earned. Her knees were still shaking from her orgasm. It felt good.

She stood up and ignored the points. Defina waved to the crowd with her pussy soaked fingers. In a minute, she would see how she scored but for now, Defina wanted to bask in the love of a million screaming fans. Right now, she was a winner.

Island Princess for Sale

The Island Princess Bedtime Stories and Activity Book is available for sale from Lulu. It is available for purchase at the startlingly low price of $9.99. Other erotica books with stories and activities can cost you as much as a thousand dollars I would imagine.

Just between you and me, this book is the shit. I am terribly proud of it. From start to finish, it is a weird erotic book that has my sense of whimsy and humor on every page. If you don't like me, you will hate this book. If you think I am mildly amusing, this book WILL BLOW YOUR MIND.

It includes every Island Princess story published on this blog plus, three BRAND NEW STORIES you have never seen. George Sportelli did the cover as well as three black and white pictures that you can color. The book includes word games, word searches, matching games, a few sexual activities and absolutely no crossword puzzles because they suck. It is a thin book perfect for sliding under your mattress. The preview copy already got me some from my wife, imagine what it can do for you!

Press the button below to be transported to Lulu's eager merchants.

Fiction: Treasure Box

“Nash Nighthammer, I have a quest for you!”

Nash looked up from his mug of ale. It was Turnik Nightslice, the accomplished thief and more accomplished rascal. He was carrying a large sack like he had just robbed a merchant’s guild. It was said that he once robbed a judge of his beard while he held court. It was also said that Turnik could steal a lump of shit from a constipated man. Nash knew that all of this was true, but most importantly; he knew Turnik was a friend.

“Don’t tease me, Turnik,” the mighty warrior said. “I have not had a decent quest in three weeks. The last quest that was offered to me was to kill some of the local wolves.”

Turnik snorted. “Tough times my friend.” The thief sat down at the table. He sat opposite Nash because when a thief is your friend, it is a courtesy to stay where you can see them.

“What do you need me to do?” Nash said. “Help knock out some guards while you steal some large gem?”

Turnik shook his head. “I have a box I can’t open. I stole it from the Mad Preist of the Unseeable but damn if I can open it.”

Nash frowned. “You can pick any lock and open any chest. If you can’t open it, what chance do I have? Do you want me to break it open?”

“Nah, my friend,” Turnik said. “I just knew this would be in your expertise.”

The thief pulled something out of the sack. It was a large box, but nothing like Nash had ever seen before. It was shaped like a woman on all fours. She was a solid piece of wood but every curve, every dimple and every inch of her wonderful body was carved with affectionate detail.

“I figured if anyone could get a box shaped like a woman to give up its secrets, it would be Nash Nighthammer.”

Later, alone in his room at the inn, Nash studied the box. He wasn’t about to try to open it with an audience. For one thing, he didn’t need Turnik’s good natured mocking as Nash tried and failed. More importantly, he didn’t want Turnik’s mocking if he opened it in a few seconds.

The strong warrior finished the last of his ale. He did have a knack with women. His broad shoulders and powerful muscles drew women to him easily. What people like Turnik never understood was that getting women as easy, knowing what to do once you have one is another adventure altogether. Nash was a warrior, but he was also a fast learner.

Nash examined the box. The wooden woman was on her hands and knees. Her heavy breasts hung down but with a Goddess’s firmness. The carved hair framed a face that looked stern. The legs appeared to be on hinges and Nash saw the scrapings of a hundred lockpicks trying to pry those legs apart.

The warrior sighed. Only a brute goes straight for the legs. He placed his hand on the back of the wooden women. He let his rough fingers lightly glide along the curve of her spine. Hands that could crush a skull between his palms were as delicate as feathers on the back of the carved woman.

The wood groaned as the back dipped.

Nash reached under the box and reached for her breasts. Instead of crushing the round wood, he gently stroked the breasts. The wood heaved in his hand but he kept stroking. With each stroke, the carved breasts seemed to get softer but the nipples became harder.

Turnik had offered him a share of whatever was in the box. He was a friend but he didn’t know Nash that well. Nash would have done this for free. Not even a magical wooden woman should go without.

He caressed the box but still it would not open. Nash wasn’t surprised.

“You are a pretty box,” he whispered. “The prettiest treasure chest I have ever seen. Won’t you please open for me, pretty box?”

The sound of cracking wood filled the small room. Nash looked to the legs but they were not moving. On a hunch, he checked the face. The stoic face was now smiling like a young woman.

“I don’t know who owned you before, but tonight I am glad you are mine,” Nash said.

A groan came from the box. The legs parted a mere inch.

“A box like you is a once in a lifetime adventure,” Nash said.

The box pressed back against his hands as the legs parted another inch.

“Damn, you are one sexy box,” Nash said.

The legs popped apart. Nash looked to see if there was an opening. There was, but it was not for a potion or a gem. This opening had hair, drops of moisture and a smell that was unmistakable.

Stopping now was unthinkable. He didn’t know if magic wooden chests had feelings, but he knew nothing should know rejection. He stood up and pulled his cock out of his loincloth.

It was a perfect fit. Nash wasn’t surprised. He was a little surprised how warm it was. He was very surprised with how wet it was. It was amazing what you could do with magic in this age.

Nash fucked the wooden box. The oddity of the situation did not occur to him. She may have been made of wood and strange mystical powers but she had needs. Nash was a warrior but at his heart he loved to aid those in need.

It also was a really hot box.

Nash climaxed. He didn’t know if the box climaxed. As soon as his seed left him, the back of the box opened. Inside was a scroll.

Nash kept fucking. The box groaned its pleasure. Only when the box became cold to his touch did he pull out.

He picked up the scroll. It was a map. More than likely it led to some secret treasure guarded by devious traps. Turnik would ask him to come along and help carry the loot. There might even be an epic battle or two waiting for them.

Nash looked down at the box. The legs were closed again. The face was smiling and the eyes were closed. He may have retrieved the map, but Nash was prouder that the box was happy.

Nash himself didn’t know where his talent with women came from. It never occurred to him that he was good with women because he treated each one of them like they were a rare treasure.

Island Princess Progress and Other Books

I spent the weekend working on the Island Princess Bedtime Stories and Activity Book. A proof copy is headed towards me and George Sportelli and when we are happy with it, you can buy it as well. Pictured here is one of the coloring pages.

By the way, George Sportelli is an artist god and I highly recommend him for anyone wanting a commission for their books, websites or personal guilty pleasures.

At barely a hundred pages I was able to drop the price significantly. It will cost around 10$ for the paperback version. Consider that my Christmas gift to you this year. I also reduced the price on some of my other books if you have been holding out. I left the price of 'Prisoner of the Wizard's Harem' alone because damn it, that thing took a lot of work.

This will also be the last book for awhile that is non-traditional. Erishella's tit, it can be a pain in the ass to plan puzzles that go past a page. It is also no fun to realize that all of your coloring pages are on the left side of the book when they need to be on the right side. In the final formatting of the book, I had to create three new activities to fill in gaps. It is so much easier to chain together a bunch of short stories than it is to chain together stories, art, a maze and puzzles.

I am also considering only doing three published books next year. 'Pusse and Cox' is written and almost ready for publishing. My untitled pirate anthology is coming along at a good pace and will hopefully be ready for summer. My Violatrix book is coming along much slower and might be ready for Christmas if I don't do a 4th book.

On the other hand, my 30/30 Porn Project is coming along in fits and starts but I have two good ideas for audiobooks. I picture these at thirty minutes or an hour long each for female submissives to listen to. Technically that would bring up my total expected books for 2011 to be five but hey, don't hold me to it.

Fiction: Lapdance and a Taco

There is a taco place where the best thing to eat is not on the menu. Called simply ‘Maria’s’ it is only open for lunch from 11 to 2. It is one of those trendy places in downtown Atlanta where bankers and executives sit around and brag about how down to earth they are as they chow down on a 5 dollar taco and drink bottled water. Maria is a stunning Mexican woman in her fifties. She has the biggest tits ever to be held in by a straining blouse.

She’ll happily sit you with you in the dining area unless you ask upfront for a number 38. That’s when things get interesting. First of all, Maria will give you a big wink and a salacious grin like she is going to jump your bones right there. She leads to the back and through a dark hallway. There is a row of doors and she opens one of them to reveal a small area barely five feet square. Inside is a chair, a single light bulb dangling from the ceiling and a small table. Maria will sometimes pinch your butt before closing the door behind you.

You wait a few minutes and then the music starts. It’s always guitars. I think it’s that mariachi music but there is no singing. You just hear the plucking of multiple guitars as they build up to an exotic beat that could only come from the south.

Right when the music is in full swing, your order comes in. A busty Hispanic woman in tight jeans and a tighter shirt comes in with a plate. On the plate is the world’s greatest taco but carrying the plate is the hottest tits and ass you’ll see that week.

Oh my God, the girls are always different but they are always beautiful. There are no skinny stick women here. The women are always curvy with an ass that can barely fit in the small space you are in. The women also have amazing breasts that are on the verge of spilling out of the low cut white cotton blouses they wear. The tits are pushing so hard against the cotton fabric that you can always make out the dark spots of their nipples on their chestnut brown skin.

Now you have a choice at this point. You can either eat the taco first, or you can have the lap dance. That to me is always the toughest choice.

That might sound crazy to you but let me tell you about the taco. First of all it is a soft taco shell that was just fried two minutes ago. The meat is a combination of chicken, pork and beef that has marinated over night in a special citrus sauce. It’s garnished with lettuce so fresh that the lettuce was still on the ground this morning. The taco is awesome just as is but they give you a little cup of salsa that was mixed by the owner and her tremendous jugs fresh that day. When you want a taco made from heaven to be a little more divine, add the salsa.

But then, you haven’t had a lap dance till you’ve had one here. The girls are clothed but that’s okay. Sexy dancing doesn’t need skin. These women dance to the strings of mariachi guitars like they have been saving their virginities just for you. She sit on your lap, they squirm, they dance and they take very deep breathes in their tight shirts. They play with their hair, they play with your hair and their whisper sweet dirty things in Spanish that I am sure are illegal.

Sometimes I eat the taco first so I can taste the exotic flavors on my lips as the beautiful woman teases me with cleavage that I want to dive in.

Sometimes I have the lap dance first so that my cock will be throbbing hard in my pants as I take my first bite of the superb taco.

The lap dancer leaves with your money and brings back the change. The music never stops which makes it nice to eat to. There no refills so you are alone on that. For 30$, it’s a steal. I mean, the taco alone should be worth 15$.

I give it four stars.